On the difference between a sealion

So, the thing about being a bureaucrat is that sometimes you are forced to work for the system even if you don't agree with it. Historically, the problem has been that the bureaucrats are too eager to please their political bosses. Would Nazi-Germany been able to function without the worker ants keeping the machinery gong? Not a chance. If enough of them had looked up from their papers, given it a second thought what it was they were taking part in, and drawn the conclusions history by now has drawn for them, there is a possibility the Holocaust would not have happened. Bureaucrats have power. They just don't use it very often.

My current assignment isn't quite as serious as that, and thus I'm not worried I am committing genocide by proxy. But I am in the capacity of my work defending a political position I disagree with personally. It certainly does nothing to help my motivation...

Maybe that is why I've been distracted all day? My research hasn't really brought me much that is useful for the job I have to do, but it brought me lots of random information I found much more interesting than what I was supposed to work on. Digressionism en diplomacy, I guess.




First of all, I've learned a lot about various species today. Extinct and otherwise. Did you know that the 18th century botanist, zoologist, physician and explorer, Georg Wilhelm Steller, had several species named after him - most of which are now either extinct or endangered? The Steller sea cow, for instance, disappeared only 25 years after he discovered it. The Steller sea lion is still around, but especially the western stock of this mammal is threatened, partly as a result of over-hunting in the past, and partly as a result of changes in their habitat (climatic and otherwise).

I have also learned a little something about different species of sea mammals: "There are sea lions on the ears, ear seals are just a hole." Or maybe the lesson learned there was that Google Translate cannot be trusted?

I have discovered the story about the adorable Tama-chan. This was a seal who for some time lived in a Tokyo river (or two, actually), and consequently it became a national celebrity in Japan. Because, you know, that's what happens in Japan when you're cute.

Tama-chan was also attempted seal-napped by a doomsday cult. Because, you know, that also happens in Japan... This cult believed that Tama-chan had been led astray by electromagnetic waves, and that returning him to the sea would save the world. They didn't succeed. This might explain the current state of the world...

And finally, if you're wondering about the title of this post? Another Google Translate glitch. It reminds me of a joke, though. I've modified it slightly to fit today's theme:

"What's the difference between a sealion?"
"It can neither ride a bike."

On what happened to Wordless Wednesday

...perhaps it drowned in a pool of flying goldfish?

On deciphering codes

I recently came across another apparent misfile in my misguided attempts to find some missing pieces explaining the missing peace in that miserable conflict in the Missle East. This time, however, I made no mistake – rather than misestimating that the document was put in my archive box as a result of a misunderstanding – I realized it was not misplaced at all. The document was put there for me to find, and it was written in code. Allow me, dear friends, to decipher the code, so that you too can enjoy the deep and meaningful message it conveys.


INCOMING TELEGRAM

From: EL CAPITALO [name altered]

Date: JANUARY 15, 1964

TOWN [name altered] FISHING CONFERENCE [the first clue – obviously something is fishy here.]

IN UNATTRIBUTED ARTICLE DATELINED TOWN [name altered] THIS MORNING’S ARRIBA [coconut drinks and suggestive music] STATES CONFERENCE CONSIDERING ISLAND ON THE OUTSKIRTS OF EUROPE [name altered] COMPROMISE PROPOSAL UNDER WHICH FISHING LIMITS SHOULD BE EXTENDED TO TWELVE MILES [I smell a red herring], EXCEPT FOR TRADITIONAL FISHING NATIONS OF NORTH SEA WATERS WHO COULD CONTINUE FISH [slap] IN WATERS 6 TO 12 MILES FROM SHORE, WITH ADDITIONAL TRANSITIONAL PROVISO THAT THEY COULD ALSO FISH [slap] FOR AS YET UNSPECIFIED PERIOD IN 3 TO 6 MILE ZONE. [If there was any doubt – the message really conveyed here will be absolutely clear if you take the second letter in every word of the previous paragraph, eliminate every third of these and shift the remaining ones around a bit. You will then get something very close to this: “NN is too Snhufu or Nihex for a hidden secret”. Fishy? That’s what I thought…]

THIS PROPOSAL, DESCRIBED AS COMPROMISE BETWEEN ISLAND ON THE OUTSKIRTS OF EUROPE, WAFFLE [name altered] (ON BEHALF OF UNION OF FROG EATERS AND LEDERHOSEN WEARERS [name altered]) AND PORTUGEESE [name altered] PROPOSALS, SAID TO HAVE ADVANTAGE OF EXCLUDING EVIL COMMUNIST STATE [name altered], SLIGHTLY LESS EVIL COMMUNIST STATE [name altered] AND EVEN LESS EVIL COMMUNIST STATE (IN FACT ALMOST NOT EVIL AT ALL) [name altered] FISHING IN COASTAL WATERS. ARRIBA [fruity drinks for all once you’ve finished the coconut one] STATES PROPOSAL LIKELY BE SUPPORTED BY AMONG OTHERS, PORTUGUEESE, ISLAND NEXT TO ISLAND ON THE OUTSKIRTS OF EUROPE [name altered] AND EL BULLFIGHTING PARADISO [name altered], WHILE SCANDINAVIANS [name not altered!], WHO HAVE ALSO EXTENDED LMITS TO 12 MILES, ARE UNLIKELY AGREE” REMAINS TO BE SEEN WHETHEC [sic] ISLAND ON OUTSKIRTS OF EUROPE WILL ACCEPT PARTIAL ACCORD WITHOUT SCANDINAVIANS.

WARDWOOD [name altered]

If you’re still a little unsure what the actual covert message was, let me say it in plain Telegram:

TELEGRAMS ARE WRITTEN IN CAPITAL LETTERS ONLY, REPEAT ONLY, TO ANNOY RESEARCHERS WHO HAS TO READ A WHOLE BUNCH OF THEM 50 YEARS AFTER THEY WERE FIRST WRITTEN STOP THIS HAS UNTIL NOW BEEN A WELL HIDDEN SECRET REVEALED ONLY TO DIPLOMATS AND HEADS OF STATE AND THE OCCASIONAL EUNUCH STOP THE CHOSEN ONE TO DISCOVER AND DISCLOSE THE SECRET, HOWEVER, IS APPROACHING STOP SHE WILL BE BORN WHEN THE SEVENTH MONTH DIES – NO WAIT – THAT IS ANOTHER PROPHECY STOP SHE WILL KNOW THE TRUTH BECAUSE IT BEARS HER MARK [Scandinavia, duh!] AND SHE WILL NOT HESITATE TO SPEAK IT TO THE WORLD STOP TOO BAD THERE ARE ONLY 17 PEOPLE FOLLOWING HER BLOG FULL STOP