I have recently decided to employ this word in my vocabulary. The problem is, in the current economy it is not exactly easy to find a position for a new word. I have tried to substitute it for other words, but somehow this tends to make the meaning of my sentences less clear. The other day on the bus I gently asked a lady to get out of the ZOMG as she was blocking my passage. However, she did not ZOMG this and just kept ZOMGing at ZOMG.
In addition, some of the substituted words are getting angry. Yesterday the pronouns accused me of exaggerated silliness, and today the verbs have threatened to boycott me if I keep using nouns as verbs. The last thing I need is angry words unioning on me.
I have tried to consult the internet as well. From the urban dictionary (which is a name that confuses me greatly as this online dictionary can be accessed anywhere, including rural areas. They do have internet access there now, you know) I gathered the following:
zOMG is a variant of the all-too-popular acronym "OMG", meaning "Oh My God". The "z" was originally a mistake while attempting to hit the shift key with the left hand, and type "OMG" Also used in all-caps, 'ZOMG' is generally used in a sarcastic manner, more often than not a humiliating fasion[sic]. It is also used as a device for stating the obvious."zOMG! you r teh winz!!one!!eleven!"[sic]
(It also confuses me that an institution that claims to be a “dictionary” is so terrible at spelling, but again this might have something to do with its “urban” image. Itz never cool to zpell poprly in the ceetay.)
Of course the problem with employing ZOMG as it was intended – as an enforced OMG – is that I don’t use OMG all that much in the first place. I have been known to say OMD (Oh, My Digression), but ZOMD just doesn’t have the same ring to it (it sounds oddly like I was trying to type “zoomed” while drunk [and as fun as frunk posting is, it isn’t half as fun when you’re not actually frunk]).
Thus, I turn to you, dear readers. What shall I do with the word ZOMG? Should I give up my arduous attempts at of expanding my vocabulary in this fashion? Or should I keep flagging at the barricades, ignoring the fact that ZOMG and other acronym-turned-common-usage-words such as LOL, WFT and the esoteric FTW are made for other generations than mine? Must I accept that I am linguistically outdated at 25?