On creative lying or bold faced awarding

I know, I know. Horrible title… I was exhausted from all the inventiveness going on further down this post, okay?


I mentioned last week that I had one more award up my sleeve. This one I’ve been holding for a while – not because I am not grateful to the wonderful Patricia Stoltey who gave it to me (I am!) – but because I’ve been slightly intimidated about its requirements.

The Bold Face Liar Creative Writer Award requires you to:

1. Thank the person who gave you the award and link to them.

2. Add the award to your blog.

3. Tell six outrageous lies about yourself and one truth. (Another variant: Tell six truths and one outrageous lie. YOU get to guess which variant I chose – and which statements are true, as well as which are lies.)

4. Nominate six creative liars –I mean writers– and post links to them.

5. Let your nominees know that they have been nominated.


I must admit I was slightly put off by the task of listing true, false and/or plausible facts about myself – mostly because I didn’t feel like I would be able to pull off writing any interesting anecdotes about myself and pretend they were lies, or pretend they were truths… I’ve only lived (almost) 25 years – I haven’t had the time for all that much action yet!

Oh, well. I tried. Like Patricia I won’t give away whether I am posting six lies and one truth, or six truths and one lie. It’s all for you to find out.



1) As should be known to all regulars here, I work part-time in a bookshop, and I have done so for eight years now. Aside from this, though, I have also had (more or less) paid work as a baby sitter, gardener, soccer camp cook, wedding player, wedding present opener, university lecturer, obituary writer and maid.


2) The only time I ever skipped school was one of my final math classes in high school, and the reason I skipped it was that I went to see the Norwegian Crown Prince who was visiting town.


3) I didn’t learn how to ride a bike until I was about twenty, and I still don’t feel comfortable riding one.


4) The only continent I have not yet visited is Africa (not counting the two poles, that is). I almost got to go to Egypt for a school trip once, but the trip got cancelled because of the Iraq war.


5) I have never failed a subject to this day. The poorest grade I ever got in school was a 3+ (which is roughly equivalent to somewhere between a C and a D), and it was in a craft class. I was so annoyed with the teacher that I talked him into giving me a better grade. (I think I ended up with 4-, which is slightly closer to a C.)


6) I once applied for a position at a show theatre, just for kicks. Much to my surprise I actually got called in for an audition (which surely would have been the most embarrassing experience of my life had I gone, but I chickened out). Who knows, maybe I could have been a show girl?


7) I was once fined and banned from the new Opera House in Oslo. The reason? Drinking in public. How was I supposed to know that this was the only place in Oslo where the otherwise dormant “public abuse of alcoholic substances” rule applied?


Those were my truths. I mean lies. I mean… Oh, you’ll find out eventually ;)



However, the most important part remains – passing the award on. Now, I always get numbers mixed up. For this one I was sure I was supposed to find seven liars, I mean bloggers, but then I reread Patricia’s post and realized I was making false assumptions… I was supposed to give the award to SIX bloggers. Oh, well. In the past I have cut the numbers short a few times, so I feel I have a little leeway here. I will stubbornly give the Bold Faced Liar Creative Writer Award to these SEVEN lovely people, in no particular order:



Mr. Stupid

Powdered Toast Man

Vatche

Leigh T. Moore

Rosie Connolly

Georgina Dollface

Boonsong Somboon





Happy guessing! I’ll check back in tomorrow with the TRUE version of my claims above.