Thursday, May 6, 2010

On social conventions (or just one, really)

I did something you are not supposed to do the other day. I drank milk directly from the carton. I don’t have the habit of doing this, but I took the liberty to break this social convention, just this once. In my defense, there was very little left in the carton, and there was no one but me around to drink it. Mine were the only lips to touch the carton, and mine were the only bacteria potentially left on it when I put in back in the fridge.

Yes, I did put the carton back in the fridge despite the fact that I had drunk directly from it. I know it’s disgusting, but would it have made it any less disgusting if the (very little) milk left in the carton had been spoiled? If anything, this would have made any bacteria I possibly transferred to the carton by drinking directly from it multiply. Not less disgusting.

Of course I should have used a glass, like any civilized person. Like me, on any other day. I would have used a glass had it not been for the fact that I recently spent 1/3 of an entire weekend doing dishes. And these dishes weren’t even mine, for the most part. So I couldn’t be bothered to waste another glass just because I wanted a sip of milk. One more glass to wash, was just one glass too many.

I swear I will finish the milk before anyone else unaware of my gross overstepping of normal behavior patterns gets to it.

I have no regrets.

I drank directly from the carton, and I am proud of it.


Rayna M. Iyer said...

I am the only one who occasionally uses skim milk at home, and I often drink straight from the carton. The bacteria are mine, and stay mine, so I am not too bothered.
Isn't it fun!

The Alliterative Allomorph said...

LOL I do this ALL the time! My partner and I are the only ones that drink it. We kiss. What's the difference? :)

Cruella Collett said...

Aha! Here I thought I was the only unclassy one, but as it turns out, this "sin" is a collective one? Interesting!

Natasha - it IS fun. In a micro rebel sort of way...

TAA - I wasn't gonna go there, but I will now... I've always been fascinated with human beings' idea of what is gross and not. Kissing, not gross (unless you're five, but most of us outgrow it). Drinking from the carton, slightly gross. Spitting into a glass (I probably shouldn't have gone there...) and then drinking it, SUPER gross! But why?!? It's still only your own saliva, that used to be in your mouth two seconds ago!

Marjorie said...

Mari you are so funny! I DO NOT under an circumstances drink out of the carton. Thing is there are 8 people that live in my house. Sets a bad example to the 5 little influencable (word?) people. I have, in the past, drunk from cartons. It's just not something I can do now.

Chary Johnson said...

Wish I could drink straight from the carton. Unfortunately, there would be an uprising of epic proportions in my apartment, beginning with the kids. *dreams*

Great post!

Cruella Collett said...

It looks like I have found more believers! Carton drinkers, unite!

I agree with the number of people sharing a household (and milk) being relevant, though. Also, I have not done it again. I don't care for the "plastic meets paper" taste. I prefer my milk to taste like it was intended - glass.

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